The guy next balcony
Asked my name
I told him what it was
I asked his in return.
It was a fair deal
Name for name.
As I walked down the staircase
I did my usual job
Hitting back the old memories
Taking slow walks.
Not listening to the loud traffic
And people rushing to work
Kids jumping on their school bus.
And me doing my usual job
Taking slow walks.
He stopped by the next day
And asked me out
I smiled denial
Saving myself for solitude
For
page 63 of Behold the Bridegroom
A cup of strong tea
A time of myself with me.
Well,
He probably was being nice
But who needs that?
He wasn’t the first one,
Was he?
No.
Another coffee, another walk, another laughter and sweet talk.
Damn, girl you’re down again.
You’re already fantasising
Stop there!
You know you’re strong
When you held yourself back
You sat back on the couch
And didn’t shed a tear
You almost remembered
What you almost had
The coffee, the walk, the laughter, the sweet talk.
But you knew you’re strong
When you held yourself back.
When you chose to save yourself
From the heart ache.
Now I see that guy around
And think of Him
The broken world of dreams
That I almost lived
I think of him more often
Like the ocean reaching the shore
The birds from tree to tree
Looking for new home
The whispering wind touching my skin
Closing my eyes I thing of him..
The shadows are fading
With arrival of darkness
After the sunset.
I touch the raindrops
And feel the broken petals.
I kept my arms wide open
Felt my heart weeping
For the shadows are fading
And the darkness has finally arrived
After the sunset.
Sunset was different earlier
Remember?
It was the orange sky
And the birds on their way back to people who felt like home
It was the raindrop falling on the roses making it fresh again
Sunset was as bright as love
The sparkling lights and relaxing sight..
Remember?
No, not anymore.
Cause sunset was different earlier.
Seeing moon on the sky
I closed my eyes
Inhaled the love,
Fantasised,
You being right beside
Like you used to be.
Touched by unceasing care
Like the fog in winter mornings
The dew drop on the fresh green leaves
And the wet ground
Covered with the aroma
Of cyclamen and crocus
And your palm on my cheeks
Like apricity
Giving me the warmth of sun
While the world was freezing.
Wrapping it all up
I opened my eyes
I stood there unloved
At the bottom line
You holding me close
In winter mornings
Was now a dream
As I was walked home
Little by little
Feeling the snow
Giving me chill
Uncertain thrill
Not having you
Now Feels like home
The broken cottage
I built by stones.
I go there every night
And feel the constant pain
This home ain’t my refuge
But the voyage uncertain
I try to visit others
To escape this haunted place
Cause no where I know
To hunt the solace
No one finds me here
It’s the cheat code of love
Like everything is fine
And I’ll sleep on the petals
Holding the red wine
Waiting for my love
To kiss me good night
And take me to the dream land.
The blind world,
Couldn’t see
I change the filthy curtains
Clean the dusty floor of love
Rub the rust from iron
To let it look
New enough.
I hold no glass of wine
That’s just a melting candle
Frightened of losing it
I live in darkness.
I take sip of sorrows
That taste like vinegar
And with each shedding tear
I get no better.
Still I go there every night
And feel the constant pain
Cause this home ain’t my refuge
But voyage uncertain.
I wait there alone,
All alone,
Thinking,
Thinking hard,
Thinking of you.
Talking to myself
Telling how hard it is now
To imagine you around.
Like I have travelled the time
Minute by minute
Day by day
Lost you somewhere
On the way.
Trying to get back to you
Unaware of the place to Find you
I have forgotten
How it feels to loved?
I have forgotten
What i felt in your arms
How you tasted...
I’ve forgotten the taste of your love.
I’ve forgotten your love
I’ve forgotten Love.
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